Poor Nugent Dirt – indeed he was hairless. The Phantom Head Shaver had struck.
GREENSLADE: Poor Nugent Dirt – indeed he was hairless. The Phantom Head Shaver had struck. The day after, I, Wallace Greenslade, opened a little tobacco kiosk. It was that week that Nugent Dirt was taken to court by his wife.
CAST: [Courtroom murmurs]
FX: [Three loud gavel bangs]
USHER: Silence in court – silence! The court will now stand for Judge Schnorrer… And if you’ll stand for him you’ll stand for anything.
JUDGE SCHNORRER: Alright, alright, get seated and let the mularky start.
USHER: M’lud – first case – Mrs. Dirt versus Mr. Dirt. Mrs. Prunella Dirt?
MRS DIRT: Yes, mate?
USHER: Raise yer right hand and yer left leg. Now, do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?
MRS DIRT: I do.
USHER: Well, you ain’t gonna get far.